What is Bullying?
Bullying is any intentional, repeated hurtful act including inflicting physical pain,
name-calling, exclusion, defacing property, hurtful pranks and public humiliation.
It's all about power. Power can be intoxicating, exhilarating and addictive. But power,
when abused, turns into bullying, and bullying hurts people, leaves lasting scars and can
destroy lives.
The goal of bullying is to gain power and control over the target by inflicting pain
through exclusion, physical or verbal means.
You can be part of the solution through awareness, insight, action.
UCLA study suggests most kids suffer from cyber-bullying: 72 percent of 12-to-17-year-olds
reported "at least one incident" of bullying online, which can take the form of name-calling
or insults, "most typically" through instant messaging or social networking sites.
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Dr. Haber's Anti-Bullying Action Steps
What to Do If Your Child Has Been Bullied
Don't Panic. Help is Here!
Many
parent find themselves asking these questions... "How do I stop a bully?
What do I do if my child is being bullied? Who do I turn to for help?"
If your child is being bullied, you’ve come to the right place. I’m Dr.
Haber, the anti-bully coach, and I’ve been helping kids, families,
schools, camps and organizations for over 20 years. I know how scary
bullying can be, and how overwhelming, upsetting, angering and
frustrating it is to see your child tormented by other kids. I know how
miserable it feels to see your kid suffering and the pain it causes. You
don’t have to fight this battle on your own. I
can help you develop a plan and get through it so you don’t have to Panic!
Here are 5 things that you can do right now:
- Try to calm yourself and talk to your child when you are calm. They already feel ashamed
and humiliated from being picked on. Your distress will upset them more and shut them down.
- Tell your child you know it is hard, and you’ll work with them to find a way to get
through this.
- Share a story of your own about bullying if you can to show them you know what this
is about.
- Don’t take over and solve the problem for them even though you may want to. Tell your
child that you'll work on a plan together that won’t make the situation worse.
- Tell your child that you will be there to help them every step of the way, and they
are not alone.
4 Bits of Good News!
- Your child has a parent who cares. You recognize they are being bullied and thank goodness
they have someone who wants to help so they don’t have to feel alone, scared and isolated.
- I know what this bully problem is all about. I’ve had experience with all types of bullying,
including cyberbullying and I help kids and families deal
with every situation. This problem is not new to me and you can get help.
- The bullying problem your child has is bad right now, but doesn’t have to continue with
the right solutions! Your child has to know they are not alone, and making this call will
show them them they can get help. And you can, too- so take a deep breath!
- Bullying is manageable, and I will help you do it.
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